Hi
I have been in a bit of a dilemma for awhile now and feel I need some advice as I am going around in circles with this.
Quite a while back I spoke to an ex-boyfriend from 2 years ago on the phone and have bumped into him a couple of times since then. We chat andhe always finishes off with "we must meet up for a drink sometime" and I usually say "That would be nice" but then neither of us bothers to follow it up.
Thething is that althoughit would probably be nice to meet up, if I'm completely honest Iam unsureabout whether I wouldREALLY like to do this.However, I am pleased that there is no animosity between us as we are bound to keep bumping into each other around the town and I feel thiswould be really awkward if there were any bad feelings.
I suppose the crux of the matter is that I was never sure where I stood with him in the 18 months we were seeing each other and I supposeI don't really believe hegenuinly wants to go for a drink to catch up on our news, more thathe is just saying this because he can't think of any other way of finishing off the conversation.
Anyway, I have decided that if we bump into each other again and he suggests meeting for a drink, its time to be honest and tell him that I don't want to go. Trouble is,I can't think of a nice way of saying it, especially as he mightmean it after all but doesn't feel confident about following up the suggestion. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks.
Sandra
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Hi Sandra,
Ifi were you i really wouldn't spend time worrying about this unless you really do want to see him again. If i ever bump into any of my ex boyfriends they always end the conversation with 'it was nice to see you again...we should go for a drink sometime'. I usually just nicely agree, becasue i know that it probably won't happen....its just a way of being polite. If you no longer have an interest in him, i wouldn't worry about it, unless he does actaully call you to arrange to go for a drink, then i think you would need to make your feelings clear.
Hope this helps
Kate
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I agree with Kate on this one.
Life is too short to worry about it.
Love
Rosi x



Thanks bothfor your replies. Its true that its not worth spending time worrying about this - I think its just that my feelings towards him seem to change quite frequently.Posting this message has helped me to recognise that I need to work a bit more onwhat I am really feeling. Thanks again.
Sandra
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I know what you mean though - it is good to have a prepared line! It sounds to me like you have got to grips with this, and maybe honsety is the best policy - something like "I'm very glad that we're on good terms, but I don't think meeting up for a drink would be a good idea. Let's just leave things as they are." I'm sure you are right - he just can't think of any way to finish the conversation nicely. Good luck!



Thanks
Yes that is how I feel. I don't want him to feel obliged to say it to 'make me feel better' (or whatever reason it is) when we aren't going to meet up for a drink and we both know that. I just want us both to be honest instead of this polite, yet false, ending to our chats. Thanks for all the advice.
Sandra
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Let him go. Sometimes its easier to go with someone you know, even if there are things you don't like about them, than find someone new. Open your eyes, become aware of your surroundings - and I guarantee, the one for you will turn up - all you need to be is AWARE;););) its called syncronocity !!
Good luck



Thanks Gilliebean,
Yes, you are right about it being easier to go with someone you know.I have done this in the past and it just caused further unhappiness.
This syncronicity thing sounds interesting (how can I find out more about this?) My friends keep saying I live in a bubble! Maybe its time totake a good look atmy surroundings - been in the bubble far too long.
Sandra
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True - you must come out of that bubble to get on with your life. You are using the bubble as protection from the world. Ask your guides to give you their protection and then you will be able to face the world and all the wonderful things it has to offer. Syncronicity is explained well in the Celestine Profecy by James Redfield, but I'm sure if you did a search on the web you would get great information. Do you ever think about someone and then a few minutes later get a phone call or letter from them. Do you ever want to know about something and then someone appears who in an expert on the matter? Thats syncronicity. All you need is to be aware - its already happening - you just have to realise that it is to benefit from it.
Good luck



Yes, those sort of things have happened quite a lot. My Reiki Master always used to say "there is no such thing as a coincidence" and I'm beginning to understand what this could mean.
There areimminant big changes ahead for me - house move and career change.I wasquite scared about these changes andfelt very anxious about them, butI ambeginning to think that they just might be happening for good reasons rather than yet more things I have to try and cope with. Thanks for your reply it has given me a lot to think about.
Sandra
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